Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Flirting at gyms

The only way I can get myself to go to the gym is to make an appointment with a personal trainer. Even then there are times when I find myself calling him to say.... "I just can't make it!" I'm essentially a lazy person. Anyway.... my trainer and I have such a good time... the hour flies by. This is the second trainer I have had... and they have both had such fantastic senses of humour that it's just a fun time.

My current trainer, K, is this cute 30 something gay guy constantly on the prowl for long term love / relationship, and settling for lots that come his way in the meantime. We have a lot in common. :) So - between bench presses, push ups, reverse crunches, and other forms of 21st century torture (have you ever seen those machines?) we compare notes on lovers and adventures of all kinds.

The gym we usually meet at is very low key and quiet. We are sometimes the only ones there. The other day, though, we met at the other branch of the gym. This one is more glass and steel, uptown, and comparatively very busy. Not really my scene. However, I did note that if I went to the gym to meet guys I would be better off going to the uptown branch. K agreed, "It can be a bit of a meat market" he said.

"Really?" I asked, feigning more interest than I actually have.

K laughed and joked that he could see me arriving in some hot lingerie rather than the standard tights and t-shirt.

I told him that at 47 years old, I didn't think I truly looked my flirting best at the gym. I favour darker places, that serve alchohol . I reckon I will have more luck if my subjects are a bit blurry-eyed.

Maybe it's time to invest in some of those lulu lemon clothes, and pull out the heavy duty makeup before going to the gym!

Monday, March 12, 2007

Economies of conflict

I'm watching Anderson Cooper on television. I'd never heard of Anderson Cooper until a few weeks ago. I was at the library, waiting for my daughter, and perusing the "New Books - Short term loan" section. Anderson Cooper's book (with the unfortunate title of "Dispatches from the edge" [i'm not kidding] ) captured my attention. I have no idea why... maybe cause I think he is good looking and his picture is on the cover. In any case, I read the book.

Now, although I usually abhore CNN, I occasionally tune in to his television show.

So - one of the stories is on the 'war on drugs" - Columbia, cocaine, etc. etc. It has taken a back seat lately to the war in Iraq / the 'war on terrorism'. Next, there is a story that puts forth Hugo Chavez as a very serious threat to U. S. security; followed by a story about the perils of poor security at airports. And I wonder.....

When was the last time the US wan't 'at war' with someone? or something? Why is our culture / economy based on conflict?

Friday, March 09, 2007

International Women's Day = K Free Day!

I am now officially a single woman again!!!!

Four years ago next month, I called the police very late one night because my then-husband (K) had attempted to kill me; and I was scared and didn't know what else to do. His perspective is that he wasn't trying to kill me.... but I felt that my life was at risk.

He promised to make the divorce as long and as expensive as possible. He did more than that - he also filed a civil claim for damages against me. He claimed that I assaulted him and then called the police and made a false claim and he suffered financially and emotionally and I should be made to pay. As part of the divorce settlement he has signed a document dropping that claim. It has been a long and expensive process - but as of yesterday (International Women's Day) I am officially divorced.

For anyone who might still question what went on that horrible night.... here is an excerpt from the claim he filed against me:

"Following the second assault on his person by [me] (assault described as a 'violent and painful slap to his face without warning'), the Plaintiff gently restrained his aggressor, placed her on the bed and advised her in a matter-of-fact manner that he could break her neck if he wanted to. [Me] began screaming loudly in an effort to embarrass the Plaintiff and draw attention to herself. Accordingly, the Plaintiff placed a pillow over her mouth to prevent her screaming as it was quite late at night."

Obviously, in his mind, this was completely acceptable behaviour. The fact that I could not breath was just a side effect I guess.

One of the darkest chapters of my life is now over. And spring is on the way. What could be better?

Have a great weekend!!!

Saturday, March 03, 2007

Happy Birthday

Every year on my birthday, I make a point of gathering my closest friends together. It helps me feel loved. It is my annual, very necessary, ego pick-me-up.

I just watched scenes from the film, "Bridget Jones Diary". The scene that gets me (probably gets most of us) is when the Mark Darcy character, played by Colin Firth, tells Renee Zellwigger's Bridget that he likes her 'just the way she is'. Well... my god.... doesn't that make all of our female (and many of our male) hearts skip a beat!

And then, shortly afterward, Bridget is making dinner for her three closest friends. Mark shows up and tries to help her salvage what is one fantastic culinary disaster. At the dinner table, surrounded by blue soup, and inedible marmalade dessert... again Bridget is toasted and loved, "just as she is!"

My god.... can any of us ask for anything more than that?

I will continue to invite my closest and dearest to help me celebrate my birthday each year. I, like most of us I suspect, need to be told as often as possible that we are loved... just the way we are.